Overwhelm. The Umbrella Term That Explains Nothing and Gets You Nowhere.
Let's get granular to get moving.
Yesterday I felt completely overwhelmed. I stood in my kitchen, looked around and there were piles of stuff everywhere. The sink was full of dirty dishes. The dishwasher was full of clean dishes. Every inch of the countertops was covered. And that’s AFTER I’d cleaned it all half a dozen of times or so.
See, I was in a Christmas Cooking Frenzy. No matter how much I cleaned, starting the next dish would recreate the mess in minutes. I was ready to quit. I sort of did - for maybe 10 or 15 minutes. I made myself some coffee, sat down, looked at all of this from a distance and thought: it’s just stuff. It’s the middle of the Messy Middle. I just need to calm down, take a deep breath, and start making a dent in this pile. And so I did. I slowed down. I simply focused on what was next. Very zen-like.
Cleaning the whole thing took me maybe fifteen minutes, and I was done for the day. (today is Part 2).
And that’s just cooking and cleaning. Creating something meaningful, something we care about, something we attach our identity to - is much harder than moving plates.
The Thing Is
It's so easy to not start or never follow through because we get overwhelmed. Things just become too much - a mountain that seems impossible to climb, a maze with no visible exit.
But why? Why exactly? And more importantly, why don't we pause for long enough to investigate this paralysis?
Is it worth it? Hell yeah.
Because overwhelm isn't just one thing - it's a complex web of interconnected challenges.
So, is it:
the scope? The sheer magnitude that makes you step back?
the learning curve that looks more like a cliff?
lack of clarity - like trying to navigate through fog?
lack of support - feeling like you're the only one on this journey?
a limiting belief whispering "this isn't for you"?
because you need to step outside your comfort zone - that cozy, familiar place?
because you lack accountability - no one waiting on the other side?
because you focus too much on the effort and not the gains - seeing the mountain but not the view?
because you don't believe:
it's possible at all
it's possible FOR YOU specifically (there's a crucial difference)
because you don't know where to start - so you remain frozen at the trailhead?
because you quickly get discouraged when you get no feedback/reward - like walking in darkness with no markers?
your relationship with uncertainty - the fear of the unknown?
because of your relationship with effort - seeing it as punishment rather than investment?
because you struggle with balancing the sense of urgency?
you either stall because you don't have enough fire under your feet
you have too much and that creates paralyzing anxiety
you have too much and that results in impatience
because of your past experiences - or lack thereof - that color your expectations?
As you can see - there are many threads in this blanket called resistance. It's rarely just one thing - or if some claim it is, that "one thing" usually unfolds into many others, like a Russian doll of challenges.
And then we end up throwing around big concepts like:
motivation (the fuel we think we need)
discipline (the engine we're told to build)
procrastination (the brake we can't stop pressing)
We search for general solutions to general problems - like throwing aspirin at every pain. Sure, it might dull the symptoms, patch some holes, but it rarely fixes the underlying issues; the root causes lurking beneath the surface.
It's rarely efficient. Why?
Because every goal is different. We change. Our circumstances change. The territory shifts under our feet.
There are some universal principles we can embrace - setting up solid systems, adopting powerful mindset shifts. Think of it as packing your backpack for an adventure into the unknown. We can study maps, listen to travelers' tales, take careful notes.
We can pack some good advice and mental tools - like Swiss Army Knives for our mindset:
how to ask better questions
how to make clearer decisions
how to dance with uncertainty
how to deploy growth mindset
But here's the crucial part: when you have your map and your mental bags packed, you enter The Territory. That's where the real story begins. That's the moment of truth.
That's when you get to practice what you packed. That's when you really learn - not in the comfortable classroom of concepts, but in the dynamic laboratory of life.
And you need to have a good mental shovel to dig yourself out when (not if) you get stuck.
When planning a journey through uncharted territory, there's no point in overpacking your mind. Take the essentials, then shop for what you need along the way. It's the delicate balance between just-in-case learning and just-in-time learning.
Don't wait to feel fully ready; that moment may never arrive. Start before you're ready - that's often the only way to start at all.
“It's a terrible thing, I think, in life to wait until you're ready. I have this feeling now that actually no one is ever ready to do anything. There is almost no such thing as ready. There is only now. And you may as well do it now. Generally speaking, now is as good a time as any.”
―Hugh Laurie
When you begin, you definitely don't have everything it takes to make it to the other side. YET. But if you stay long enough, if you learn along the way, if you keep moving forward - you will get there.
What you really need are metaskills - the tools to build tools:
Knowing how to learn
How to ask yourself moving-forward questions
How to identify your bottlenecks
How to define problems clearly before hunting solutions
How to get out of your own way
These are your true companions on the journey - more valuable than any map or guidebook.
I'm building something for overthinkers. You know - the ones who care so much they get stuck. A tiny space for people who are done with the resistance story, so they can get out of their own way.
Want in? Here's what's next:
Hope to see you on the other side!